Terrifying Mannequins of the World

It's a great big scary world out there. We all get scared sometimes but I try not to show it. However I do have a weakness which was recently caught me out. I was leaving the office, it was around midnight and the streets were quiet and dark. I was on my way to catch the train when I saw this from the corner of my eye.

Thats's right, it's your resident tropically-tanned, leukemia-suffering, child-raping hobo mannequin! Seriously there is little else as creepy as a mannequin, and they seem to be everywhere. NATO, if you are listening, forget about the Arab spring, please divert all warplanes to whoever the fuck manufactures these things.

There is no escape. I moved to the other side of the Earth, and I thought 'in sunny Australia, nothing is scary apart from the spiders, snakes, crocs and aboriginal peoples(for some reason they have a grudge against the English?)' But no...

The sisters live at Victoria market in Melbourne where they use the siren song of their poorly cut 80s power suits to lure in unsuspecting women before presumably absorbing their very essence using voodoo withcraft.

And then there's this fellow...

Look at that smile. This chap lives at the old Melbourne Gaol, where Aussie folk hero/criminal maniac Ned Kelly was executed. Let me say that again. This guy lives in an abandoned prison. There is no explanation for his presence, no historical tidbit to read. It's just him, in an empty jail cell from the 19th century. His only reason to be, is to fuck your shit up. Throw in the fact that he looks like he just ate your new puppy and couldn't be bothered to wipe the fur off and it makes for one creepy fucker. But all this is nothing compared to Bolivia...

I've never been to Bolivia and this is why.(Thanks to A Ro for these pics). What is with the eyes, the hair and why is he chewing on my blackened soul? I am not going to sleep tonight, it just freaks me out. At least it's over now.

Holy Shit.

give me nightmares by sending pics of Hellish Pseudo-men to me on twitter @GregTheBastard. Sweet dreams....